Sunday, December 22, 2013

Me, my thoughts and I.


Lena Dunham, that special and eternally criticized person who created GIRLS, says in the trailer for the show’s season three “It is really liberating to say no to shit you hate”. Damn she’s right.

However Lena, it is also very liberating to say ALL the shit you hate.

Sometimes we don’t realize it, but we accumulate all these small (or big) thoughts that figure their way to stay in our minds for years and it doesn’t matter how tolerant one can be. You just hate those things. You hate them so fucking much.

And the problem isn’t that you hate them, the problem is that you can’t take them out of your mind. It is a problem because it doesn’t let you work the way you have to. If you want to enjoy life, even with its misfortunes, you need to get rid of those thoughts. The issue comes when you start that conversation between you and them:

AnaP: Hey, how are you doing? I’m sure you are very comfortable and all, but I think you should really leave…
Thought: What?
AnaP: Yeah… like… I’m not functioning well with you here. I don’t sleep, I don’t eat… I lost 10pounds you know? I can only wear two pair of jeans, 5 years ago that would have been amazing but I look like a corpse now…
Thought: I’m not leaving
AnaP: I… I know it’s going to be difficult, but… honestly… I’m not really enjoying life as I wanted to and I am pretty sure it is because of you. I need you to go.
Thought: That is not happening.


And there they stay… Motherfuckers.

And then you hate yourself. It becomes a bacteria that starts in a small part of your brain until it covers it all, not leaving a space for you to be strong and repeat the conversation until they decide to be rational and leave your brain where they plan to stay for the rest of their life, or actually, your life.

But sometimes a situation arise in the most unexpected (or expected moment) and if you keep renting those thoughts in your brain and letting them sleep, walk, work, eat with you, then you’ll be completely fucked. So you better open they’re room door and kick them out. Don’t ask for it, just tell them:


GET THE FUCK OUT!



iTunes plays: Marcher droit By: Tryo
AnaPé says: Just one week left in my hometown. Come on, I know you can do better than this!

Saturday, November 30, 2013

From Us to Us & You


From Frankie to Ana

Anaa Bananaa! Why did you leave me?

Stupid Ana.
Going back home and stuff.
Ugh.
I dislike you right now.
__

You know what I don’t say enough to this girl: I love you. I guess it’s hard for me to constantly be open about my feelings to a lot of my friends, unless they’ve known me for an extreme amount of time. But I mean, for the short period of time that we’ve known each other, we’ve spoken about so much, and I’ve never been shy to express myself around her. We barely have things in common, or at least, I don’t think so, but for some reason, we just click.
She’s so blunt.

And she’s right a lot of the time.
So – why do we get along so much?
I think it has to do with determination. We both have this ridiculous character: we never give up. 
Only, Ana does it in a classier way than I would. This girl is so classy I can’t deal.

Ana is a beautiful person, inside and out. She has a lot to offer and I know she knows it. That’s what I really like about her. She gives off this amazing aura: “Don’t stand in my way bitches. I’m on a roll.”  - and she has proven that statement time and time again. Anything she puts to her mind, she does.

Example #1: This blog.

Day 1

Ana: Hey Frankie! Let’s start this blog together.

Me: No.

Ana: So, like it would be about our film. We can post a bunch of pictures and share the experience with other people.

Me: No.

Day 10

Ana: Ok, so “Much Ado About Nothing” is the name of the blog.

Me: No.

Ana: Okay, I made you an administrator.

Me: 


Ana: 


__

Well, you get the picture.  She’s definitely on a different level than I am, and I respect her for that.

There’s on thing that you should know about Ana though, and that’s what I think characterizes her the most: her passion. No matter what she is passionate about, she sees it through. That’s how I know her to be. If you get to know her, you can tell just by listening to the way she speaks. She talks about her travels with so much love in her voice. She talks about her goals with so much ambition. She knows so much about everything, and, to be honest, I have never met such an inspiring individual before.

She grows on you.

Plus, I really like saying her name in a whiny voice: “Anaaaaaaa.”


p.s. Just a little secret: The day I really learned to enjoy Ana in my life was when she proved to me that she could twerk. 

_________________________________________________________________________________


From Ana to Frankie

I've always thought that the best connections you will build in your life are those of which you never had any previous expectations. That was the case with my exchange year country (Hungary), that was the case with starting university in Canada, and that was the case with Frankie. 


Having no idea who she was for around a month and a half, I only made note that she would begin every participation in class with the phrase "I just wanted to say..." followed by something insightful. First time I actually interacted with her was when we were having some Jack Daniel's honey whisky in a pre-drinking reunion. We would speak about alcohol, university, travels, drugs and obviously sex. A subject she was not afraid to talk about. It reminded me a little bit of me and the sassyness I would apply speaking about it in my mother tongue, but at that moment I had not yet developed the same sassyness in English (she helped me with that later on). At some point she said "I brag about it but I don't really do too much" to which I respond "Yeah I know, I'm kinda the same, too much ado about nothing" she opens her eyes and claps very hard saying "EXACTLY!", an expression she still does every time I say something and she agrees.

She was a mysterious character but I got to know her so well that she can't avoid telling me things even if she tries ignoring my insistence. However, she can be hard headed, like when I want her to send me the script and even if it is done she doesn't. I really try to understand her, but this doesn't make sense. Frankie is always there for you, whenever you need her. She helps others without expecting any rewards. She would come all the way from her island in the North, spend two hours crying in traffic just to hear me complain in person, but after giving me her enlightening advice she'll say "Let's have a drink," and we'll forget about our misfortunes and enjoy talking about what the future holds and planning things that will eventually become something... I think.

I can't really tell how we became such good friends, we are not equals. She looks more latin than me, she stresses way too much during the semester whereas I am more easy going in that aspect. I guess we just complement each other with our differences, or we just admire each other on that side that we'd like to improve. 

Even if she doesn't tell me, I am pretty sure she decided to go into film just because I chose to go there. She keeps saying it is because she loves the Bolex, but I know she just wants to follow me. I see it in the everyday texts asking where I am, clearly freaking out "ANAAAAA BANANAAAAA ANAAAA ANAAAA ANAAA WHERE R U!!". 
Either how, there's something I am positive about, we make an awesome team, in school and in life, we know when to support each other and when to judge our behaviour too. Hopefully this blog will make this connection stronger, now that we are working in our first serious short film, here we'll share our happiness and our fears that surround not only this ambitious project, but also our day-to-day lives.



Frankie & Ana